The Do’s and Don’ts of Effective 1 on 1 Meetings for First-Time Managers

Starting your journey as a new manager can feel like stepping into a whirlwind. Suddenly, you're not just responsible for your work—you’re accountable for an entire team. One of the most powerful tools at your disposal? 1 on 1 meetings. Done right, these conversations can unlock productivity, increase employee engagement, and foster a culture of trust. Done wrong, they become a weekly calendar filler everyone quietly dreads.

Let’s explore the essential do’s and don’ts of running effective 1 on 1 meetings with employees, especially for first-time managers looking to build trust and drive performance.

DO: Make 1 on 1 Meetings a Consistent Habit

Consistency is key. Your team should never have to wonder if their 1 on 1 meeting will happen this week. These aren’t optional check-ins—they're strategic conversations. Weekly or bi-weekly meetings are ideal for most teams, depending on size and workload.

By holding space for regular 1 on 1 meetings with employees, you're showing that you value their time, input, and development. This regular cadence also allows you to address issues early, recognize wins, and maintain a strong connection even in remote or hybrid environments.

DON’T: Treat 1 on 1s Like a Status Update

Too many new managers fall into the trap of using 1 on 1 meetings as mini status reports. While it's important to stay informed, this time should be employee-focused, not project-focused. Save status updates for team meetings, dashboards, or async updates.

Instead, use 1 on 1 meetings with employees to dive deeper into their motivations, challenges, goals, and ideas. Ask open-ended questions like:

“What’s been the highlight of your week?”
“What’s something blocking your progress?”
“Where do you want to grow in the next quarter?”

Remember, this is your employee’s meeting—let them set the agenda when possible.

DO: Create a Psychological Safe Space

A trending theme in 2025 leadership circles is psychological safety—the idea that team members feel comfortable expressing ideas, concerns, or failures without fear. Your 1 on 1 meetings are the perfect environment to foster this.

Encourage honesty and transparency. When your team knows they can speak openly with you, you'll get real insights, not surface-level answers. That can lead to better decision-making and stronger team dynamics.

Pro tip: Show vulnerability yourself. Share your own challenges when appropriate to normalize that growth and uncertainty are part of leadership.

DON’T: Cancel or Reschedule Frequently

Nothing erodes trust faster than a manager who always bumps 1 on 1 meetings for “more important” things. When you cancel, the message your employee receives is: “You’re not a priority.”

Emergencies happen, but strive to reschedule rather than cancel altogether. Protect this time the same way you would a meeting with your own boss—or better yet, more seriously.

DO: Come Prepared

Your employee likely comes to the meeting with notes or updates—return the respect by showing up prepared. Review past 1 on 1 meeting notes, check in on action items, and think through feedback or coaching points in advance.

Preparation also helps you avoid the dreaded "So... what’s up?" opening and keeps the meeting intentional. Tools like Lead Honestly or Fellow can help guide your conversations with prompts and agendas that align with professional growth and team goals.

DON’T: Avoid Difficult Conversations

As a new manager, it’s tempting to steer away from conflict. But 1 on 1 meetings with employees are the perfect time to deliver constructive feedback in a private, supportive setting. Avoiding tough topics only allows problems to fester.

The key is to frame feedback around growth, not punishment. Use “I noticed…” statements and tie everything back to impact. Always follow up with ways you’ll support their improvement.

DO: Ask for Feedback, Too

One of the most overlooked uses of 1 on 1 meetings is reverse feedback—asking your employee how you can improve. This shows humility and signals that learning is a two-way street.

Try questions like:

“What’s one thing I could do to better support you?”
“Is there anything I should start or stop doing as your manager?”

Over time, this opens up a feedback culture that boosts team performance and trust.

DON’T: Rush Through the Meeting

Even when things are going smoothly, resist the urge to cut a 1 on 1 meeting short. Some of the most valuable conversations happen in the final minutes, once the formal updates are out of the way.

Allow space for silence, thoughtfulness, or off-topic banter. Building rapport isn’t a distraction—it’s a strategic investment in long-term engagement.

Final Thoughts

For first-time managers, learning how to run effective 1 on 1 meetings with employees can feel like learning a new language. But with consistency, empathy, and intention, these meetings can become your most powerful leadership tool.

In a world where remote work, burnout, and disengagement are trending concerns, mastering the art of meaningful 1 on 1 meetings isn’t just good practice—it’s essential for building high-performing, loyal teams.

So take the time, ask the questions, and listen deeply. You’re not just managing tasks—you’re developing people. And that’s the real work of leadership.